Dads, be careful!

Men,

For those of you who were at the Father’s Heart Weekend, I am the “baseball guy”. I had an absolute BLAST getting to talk baseball with all of you. It was an honor and joy to suit up again and feel a part of something that was such a major part of my own life, and still is.

Dads, something hit me really hard today. I realized, at age 38, that I have been carrying around something in my mind and in my heart that my own father unknowingly put on me. I have been carrying a sense of “nothing is ever good enough”. My dad is a perfectionist, as am I. I can remember playing ball growing up and one particular game stands out. I was a senior in high school, and we played a double-header one day. In this double-header, I had seven hits, two of them being home runs. I think I had 8 RBI’s too. The only other thing that stands out to me is that I made an error in one of the games on defense. I felt really good about the day and when I went home, I called my dad, who was at work and missed the games. I told him how I did and that I had seven hits, two home runs, etc. I then told him I booted a ball and made the error. After I finished my report on the game, the only thing he said, for whatever reason, was “Why did you make that error?”.

Guys, I can’t tell you how this one instance has affected my life. This was 21 years ago and I can remember exactly where I was sitting, what I was wearing, and I can remember how utterly shattered I was, even at 17, that my dad only focused on the ONE negative part of a great day for me and my team.

Men, what you say matters. Your words have power. You have the opportunity to name things properly for your boys. You have the opportunity to celebrate your sons and their accomplishments, whether huge or small. Know who you are, and break the cycle of the wounds you have from your own father, and give your sons something that will last forever. Kick their butts (metaphorically) when needed but do it out of love. When they are excited about something, get excited with them!! I believe my dad, in his own way, wanted to push me to make me better, but as a young man, that’s not what I heard. I love my dad. I have never known a more giving man and loving man (in his own way). But guys, let me tell you, your sons look to you for so much. They want to be defined by you. They want to know how to be a man. The way they look at you will eventually mirror the way they look at God!! Trust me on this. CELEBRATE YOUR SONS!! Be careful when choosing your words and look for reasons to instill in your sons all the things that God wants from us as men. Dive into scripture and find all you can on the things that God calls for us, as men, to be and transfer those things to your sons. You can do this. Be careful!!

Kyle